19 October 2015

Too freaky ... 

The Year Ahead

Forecast for October 2015 to October 2016

If You Were Born Today, October 19:
You are self-expressive and animated in speech. Your memory is outstanding when it comes to the "little things" that you pick up from others and when it comes to the past. You are curious and possess a dual nature--sometimes chatty and rational, and other times withdrawn and moody. You are quite determined and possess resolve. With good business sense and the ability to "read" people well, you are likely to enjoy much success in life as you age. You have the rare gift of the ability to be assertive and charming at the same time. You are charming, creative, and personable. Famous people born today: Evander Holyfield, John Lithgow, John Le Carre, Robert Reed, Jason Reitman, Desmond Harrington.

Your Birthday Year Forecast:
The Sun in a waxing sextile to the Moon in your Solar Return chart has a fortunate influence on your year ahead. You can be especially productive this year, as in many ways you are starting fresh, but you have a rather clear vision of what you want to accomplish. Your inner needs tend to be mirrored by external events, and vice versa, which helps to boost your confidence and happiness levels. You more readily accept that challenges are part of the natural cycle in life, which in turn helps you to meet them with confidence and to worry less. You are likely to be on top of your game this year for the most part, and positive connections with others can be made fairly easily. A comfortable level of personal popularity helps keep conflict to a minimum. With the ability to handle your emotions successfully, there will be less stress on both your mind and body.

This can be a year in which you are building faith and confidence in your personality, skills, and talents. You can experience a stronger desire to seek out meaning, wisdom, and mental stimulation in your life during this period. Others might frequently turn to you for guidance.
This can be a good period for gaining support and recognition from others, and you may be forming alliances that last a long time. Through your contacts with others, you are encouraged to grow, but also to pay more attention to rules and structure.

This is an important year for motivation and ambition, even if energy levels are sometimes up and down. You might enjoy increased influence, faith, and insight. The desire for more personal significance can be strong. The ability to sway or persuade can be enhanced this year. You might go to great lengths to better yourself, you could solve a long-standing problem, or capitalize upon a resource that was previously hidden.

You have great enterprising spirit this year, attracting strong opportunities on both professional and personal levels. You are able to see the "big picture", which helps you to plan effectively. You have significantly more courage and gumption, making the year ahead a unique one in which you are ready to try new things.

Personal magnetism is tremendous this year. This is a good period for creative projects and joining with others in pursuing a common goal. However, some caution with your personal finances and regarding your social relationships is in order. Try not to turn a blind eye to problem areas, as these can accumulate. Most importantly, you should do your best to watch out for tendencies towards self-deception. Things might look too good to be true, simply because you want to see the best. Relationship ups and downs are possible. The "highs" of a relationship may be thrilling, but the accompanying "lows" can be draining. However, tuning into reality from time to time can in fact stabilize things and bring a better balance to your life. 

Avoid sweeping changes with relationships unless you've truly thought things through.
This is a year for exploring possibilities, self-improvement efforts, and for strong personal and professional goals. You have an especially enterprising spirit and might initiate new endeavors. You're ready to put the effort into pursuing your goals. Be vigilant with financial affairs - stay grounded. Watch also for doing so much for others that you forget your own needs.

2015 is a Number One year for you. Ruled by the Sun. This is a year of action. The seeds you plant now, you will reap later. Others might find you less sociable, as you are busier than ever and you focus on your activities and your needs. Still, you are outgoing and your initiative is stronger than ever. Advice - Stand alone, take action, start fresh, express independence.
2016 will be a Number Two year for you. Ruled by the Moon. This is a year of potential companionship. It is a quiet, gentle, and mostly harmonious year that is less active than other years. Instead, you are more responsive to the needs of others. If you are patient and open yourself up in a gentle manner, you will attract both things and people. This is an excellent year in which to build and develop for the future. Advice - be patient, be receptive, enjoy the peace, collect.

18 October 2015

PeriMe

47.

I turn 47 tomorrow. That's messing with my mind. I feel like a teenager lately with my biggest goal being  to FigureMyShitOut.  

I'm work in water treatment after spending years and big piles of money to certify for this career but I am a stranger in a strange land there most of the time. 

I have the opportunity again to run my late father's restaurant (I know, AGAIN??). But do I ::really:: want to do that?? Like really, really, really?

I volunteer with my local conservation authority and am a newly annoited Neighbourhood Leader for a food rescue organization. I love the volunteer work but it does not pay the bills.

I'm interested in permaculture and aboriginal knowledge of the land and water and spend alot of time on building understanding through ceremony. But I was not born to native parents and may or may not have aboriginal ancenstry so there are times where I feel like I don't belong in some of those circles.

And of course there's the physical acrobatics. My body reminds me at very irregular times with either a no show or a flood that the clock ticks are counting down. My mood is just as unpredictable.

Physical. Emotional. Mental. Spiritual. 

Working on one at a time these days.

Thanks for reading...






22 February 2015

Doubts and certainty (Seeds part 3)

Doubts and certainty

The commitment made, know/hope to be right
sets fear twisting me tight
my voice still feeling small my thoughts still unwhole
the picture i keep grasped to my soul

snowflakes spin webs connecting dreams to the Earth
I'll enter the caves above, below, within and look to the four
Listen to the stories of my grandfathers stone
Follow the footsteps up my mountain alone

Feb 22 2015,

11 February 2015

truth [past life]

i wish i didn't have technicolour dreams
that drag me off to a raging sea
ride the waves of hopes and plans
crash on the shore of reality again and again

it gets harder to lift myself back up
to keep the faith, to trust, to love
alone in my tower staring through glass
thinking I can leave things in the past

I do know at least this to be true
I'm not strong enough to wait for you
sit, imprisoned for another year
kept company with pain and tears

letting 'what this is' (was) go will hurt
but each day brings me further out
farther away from your embrace
that never seems to want to come my way

2011

2 January 2015

LAKOTA CODE OF ETHICS
1. Rise with the sun to pray. Pray alone. Pray often. The Great Spirit will listen, if you only speak.
2. Be tolerant of those who are lost on their path. Ignorance, conceit, anger, jealousy - and greed stem from a lost soul. Pray that they will find guidance.
3. Search for yourself, by yourself. Do not allow others to make your path for you. It is your road, and yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you.
4. Treat the guests in your home with much consideration. Serve them the best food, give them the best bed and treat them with respect and honor.
5. Do not take what is not yours whether from a person, a community, the wilderness or from a culture. It was not earned nor given. It is not yours.
6. Respect all things that are placed upon this earth - whether it be people or plant.
7. Honor other people's thoughts, wishes and words. Never interrupt another or mock or rudely mimic them. Allow each person the right to personal expression.
8. Never speak of others in a bad way. The negative energy that you put out into the universe will multiply when it returns to you.
9. All persons make mistakes. And all mistakes can be forgiven.
10. Bad thoughts cause illness of the mind, body and spirit. Practice optimism.
11. Nature is not FOR us, it is a PART of us. They are part of your worldly family.
12. Children are the seeds of our future. Plant love in their hearts and water them with wisdom and life's lessons. When they are grown, give them space to grow.
13. Avoid hurting the hearts of others. The poison of your pain will return to you.
14. Be truthful at all times. Honesty is the test of ones will within this universe.
15. Keep yourself balanced. Your Mental self, Spiritual self, Emotional self, and Physical self - all need to be strong, pure and healthy. Work out the body to strengthen the mind. Grow rich in spirit to cure emotional ails.
16. Make conscious decisions as to who you will be and how you will react. Be responsible for your own actions.
17. Respect the privacy and personal space of others. Do not touch the personal property of others - especially sacred and religious objects. This is forbidden.
18. Be true to yourself first. You cannot nurture and help others if you cannot nurture and help yourself first.
19. Respect others religious beliefs. Do not force your belief on others.
20. Share your good fortune with others.

1 January 2015

Hope

[E]verything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms — to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way. - Viktor Frankl

Sometimes, ok ... many times, in the course of my work to protect water or speak out for the earth, I feel overwhelmed with bad news: climate change, disappearing forests, biodiversity loss, great stinkin piles of plastic garbage in the ocean, the list goes on forever.  


It's hard to see light and hope in all that dark, so when I find gems like Viktor Frankl's writing or find about organizations like the Rockefeller Foundation, I get the courage again to continue the fight. 

Today, again, I chose light. I chose hope.

From: http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2013/03/26/viktor-frankl-mans-search-for-meaning/

A man who becomes conscious of the responsibility he bears toward a human being who affectionately waits for him, or to an unfinished work, will never be able to throw away his life. He knows the “why” for his existence, and will be able to bear almost any “how.”

Frankl argues that presence comes from leaning into suffering, not from tensing against it:
When a man finds that it is his destiny to suffer, he will have to accept his suffering as his task; his single and unique task. He will have to acknowledge the fact that even in suffering he is unique and alone in the universe. No one can relieve him of his suffering or suffer in his place. His unique opportunity lies in the way in which he bears his burden. 








Childhood

sitting under my tree skirt of dappled light dancing on the forest floor
I could believe I was invisible, ethereal, controlling my universe of pine needles
that I could speak to the faeries and spirits of the wind, that they heard me
when no one else would sit still to listen.

Lonely free my world became that space in my head
Between phrases ink spills onto pages


23aug2014